Last week I sent an email about the very likely chance the government will begin making online business more difficult.
And I peppered that email with things that I hoped would piss someone off and get me a troll.
But alas. When I checked my email, a troll I did not have.
Instead, I had a slightly sassy response.
Coming online crackdown?
Hasn’t this been happening for 2+ years with the blood bath of Facebook/Google Affiliate marketers and their non compliant “magic weight loss pills” getting butchered?
Indeed. That’s true.
Platforms like Google have been cracking down on SEO and ads for years and years.
And a close reading of that email would show that was indeed the point.
The “coming” part of the online crackdown specifically referred to government interference. Which we saw with the EU’s privacy laws passed a few years ago… and is continuing with laws like AB-5.
The point wasn’t that I’m some soothsayer who is seeing the future when no one else is.
The point is that this has always happened.
And will continue to happen.
And anyone with a modicum of awareness can clearly see it happening and can see how it is very likely to get worse very soon.
So if you’d like to get me writing and consulting for your business before our overlords throw us in the online marketing gulag, check this:
First you gotta head here and unlock my daily email tips
A few years back, a friend sent me this cartoon:
As a vinyl collector, this gives me all the feels.
Because I’ve spent countless hours (and countless hundreds) finding, buying, storing, cleaning, and doing all the other things it takes to keep records and their players in tip-top shape.
Not to mention the days I’ve spent shuffling through dusty record stores trying to find a yet-to-be-earthed gem.
All of which I enjoy and am happy to do.
Yet, at the same time, it’s a total pain in the ass.
Which brings up an interesting point about sales and marketing.
Which is that if you have something your audience really wants, they will do just about anything to get it.
In fact, in the case of vinyl, part of the fun *IS* the extra time and effort it takes.
So how can you use that in your marketing?
Truth be told, I’m not totally sure.
It’s all situational.
In most cases most of the time, I’m a big believer you should make buying from you as easy as possible. Which means optimizing landing page load times, making checkout pages simple as pie, easy customer service, etc and so on.
But if you have a niche business with a white-hot audience?
Then barriers, scenic pullovers, and a veritable “maze” can sometimes flip their fanaticism into overdrive.
Something to noodle on at least.
One of the secrets of getting white-hot fans regardless of niche is good copy.
For help with that, click the link below and fill out the form. When you do, you’ll be added to my daily email tips:
I recently heard someone say that most entrepreneurs are “from the island of misfit toys”.
In other words, most of us didn’t fit in, are unhirable, or for whatever reason live outside the circle of reality populated by “normies”.
Which I’ve found to be 1000% true.
But there’s something else I’ve noticed too:
Many business owners—in an attempt to buy their freedom—build their business in a way that just creates another job.
So they get into it to make more money and spend more time at home with their family…
But end up waking up early to squeeze in work… stay up late to finish projects… and even get stuck behind the computer during holidays in an attempt to get done the ten thousand tasks that pile on their ever growing to-do list.
It’s enough to make you say:
“I just don’t want to worry about this shit anymore”
Especially because most entrepreneurs are smart and creative.
We don’t like doing tiny little frustrating tasks that sap our energy and make doing the big important things harder.
Because when you’re bogged down doing stuff you don’t want to do and aren’t good at—and doing those things takes time away from your health, family, and the things that inspire you (i.e. all the reasons you started a business in the first place)—then it sorta begs the question “what the hell is the point”?
Of course there will always be things you need to get done that aren’t your “main squeeze” tasks.
Which is fine.
But every business leader I’ve studied teaches to get as many of those tasks off your plate as you possibly can.
Especially something like copywriting.
Because strategizing campaigns, thinking up hooks and angles, and sitting down to draft and edit copy takes up a ton of RAM on your mental computer (especially if copywriting is something that doesn’t come to you naturally).
RAM you could otherwise use profitably elsewhere.
Or RAM you could use to spend more time doing the things you love.
So if you’re currently stranded on the sea of overwhelm and you’ve ever thought to yourself “I just don’t want to worry about this copywriting crap anymore”, grab the liferaft below:
The following three (made up) subject lines all share a glaring mistake.
(Possibly more than one. But there is one in particular that stands out like a plank in the eye.)
Can you spot what it is?
1) How to scour the internet for new clients
2) Read, write, and study your way to nearly any skill
3) New “bucket of sweat” workout drops weight fast!
Know what it is?
No, then you better sign up for my daily email tips here:
P.S. If you think you know it, you should still sign up and email me your answer. Just to make sure you're right...
A friend of mine (who owns a podcast production company) sent me an article a while back about how podcasting giant Gimlet Media is getting sued for being inaccessible to deaf people.
On one hand I feel it.
It would suck to be born with a disability that made it much harder to function in society.
But expecting—nay forcing—the world to bend and cater to your whim?
Seems excessive to me.
After all, Charlie Kaufman’s films are inaccessible to those with low IQs and lack of cinematic knowledge.
Should he be penalized?
What about rollercoasters? Short people and pregnant ladies can't ride them.
Should they be shut down?
But my guess is no.
Anyway, you may be wondering, what does this have to do with you?
Well in this ever increasing sensitive world… and with more and more stuff—including business, voting, social life, and more—coming online… the 1984-esque, lawyer-controlled oppressive regime will only get worse.
And even though emails probably won’t be affected by ADA requirements because screen readers take care of it, you never really know what the next turn will be.
We’ve seen it with the EU. We’re seeing it with podcasts.
And next, we might see them coming for you.
Which is why I’ve kept this in the back of my mind ever since I heard Ben Settle talk about it (it’s something he said he learned from reading Dan Kennedy’s autobiography):
Make your money while you can.
Because if you look back over the last 100 years, taxes, laws, regulations, and stupidity only seem to increase.
If you'd like to make your money while you still can, I suggest sprinting (not walking) to the link below where you can unlock more of my money-making tips:
When you do, you will be added to my waitlist and will be notified when I next have an opening in my schedule. Which will be November at the earliest and possibly not until 2020 breathes its last gasping, corona-scented breath and 2021 ushers in Fuhrer Chump's American Reich.
P.S. The (very likely) coming online crackdown mixed with the increased competition is another reason I’m considering starting an entirely offline business. If you don’t use any offline media (at least direct-mailing your best buyers) I highly suggest you begin considering it.
Right now, I mostly only write email copy. So if you want help with that, the link is above.
As a marketer, you know that offer to list match is always more important than copy.
But in my experience, there are many tweaks and turns you can make in your copy that can help sell even incongruent offers to burnt out lists.
For example, there’s a simple subject line secret I recently used in an affiliate campaign selling an offer that wasn’t fully congruent. And the email I used it on kicked butt (it brought in nearly a quarter of the sales from the entire campaign).
And this subject line secret is totally counter-intuitive.
Because it’s all about lowering potential readership.
Which is why it’s something you’re very unlikely to hear bandied about by people who boast on their open rates.
But when it comes to less-than-congruent offers, this subject line technique (and carrying the technique through in the body copy) makes the prospect feel like the offer is catered to them.
And the truth is, it has nothing to do with talking about the offer and everything to do with talking about the prospect.
Which is a lot harder for most people.
Because understanding an offer is way easier than understanding a person.
We are complex human beans after all.
But if you’re ever in the position of selling not fully congruent offers (which I hear health lists have been selling financial offers profitably since Coroney hit, so it’s not as crazy as you think) this is the main technique I’d recommend.
Welp, that’s all I'm gonna say on the matter.
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When I started writing copy, I did everything the gurus taught:
Read. Study swipes. Hand copy controls. Take courses. And so on and so forth.
But still, every time I’d send copy into a client… I’d cringe.
Because I didn’t really know if it was good.
I hadn’t written enough.
Or seen how copy performed in the real world.
So not only was landing clients scary. Fulfilling the work was scary too.
And even when they’d send back an email saying “good work” I’d doubt it. I’d think “They’re lying. They don’t really know good copy. It’s gonna bomb.”
It took me a long time, a lot of books, a lot of courses, and a lot of swipes before I felt like “I got this”.
If I could go back and do it again, I’d spend way less time and money on that and use the “cringe method” to shortcut it all.
What’s the “cringe method”?
Get someone who understands good copy to tear your work a new booty-hool (in a good way).
I call it the “cringe method” because at first it may make you cringe to get your flaws pointed out.
But I can tell you, when you get your copy critiqued, you can pick up more immediately applicable info than by reading an entire book.
At least that’s been my experience.
Because critiques are imminently catered to the exact problems holding your copy back right now.
It’s not theory.
It’s not hard to understand concepts.
It’s imminently useful.
Best of all, it gives you confidence that what you wrote has a “working copywriter stamp of approval”.
And that’s priceless.
Because nothing prevents you from writing like fear of failure.
I do offer critiques sometimes. But only to those who are signed up for my email list.
Which you can do, and you will also unlock all my email tips, by heading here:
Al Davis, the late coach of the infamous Oakland Raiders, once said something incredibly wise that can guide your decision-making in life, business, and finding podcast guests too.
It has to do with being reactive versus being proactive.
In other words, you can play your opponents game and react to what they do. Or you can create the game and make your opponent react to you.
Here’s it in his own words:
"We don't take what the defense gives us; we take whatever the hell we want."
Well said Al.
I wish I would've heard that when I was young.
Because the applications are many:
Don’t wait for the perfect spouse, friend, network to arise. Go out and find the right spouse, friend, network for you.
Don’t wait for the research to show you the right copy angle. Choose a great copy angle and go find the research to back it up.
And don’t wait for the perfect podcast guest to knock on your studio door. Go find a great podcast guest and reel them in with your web (mixing metaphors, I know).
The trouble is, it takes a lot of time and effort to find a good podcast guest.
And as a guest, it takes a lot of time to find and pitch podcasts.
Which is one of the reasons I’ve only been going on shows where I get referred.
Like the one I was on recently where the host just emailed me:
“I was blown away by you when you appeared as a guest on my show.”
And really, wowing the host ain’t hard.
You just gotta prepare by thinking up stories and analogies that explain your point. And if you’re like me, you won’t hold anything back.
In fact, I essentially think of it like a paid consultation.
Whatever the host asks, I spill the beans.
Which brings us to the tip of this spear:
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In 5th grade I joined an after school chess club. (Yes, I was that type of nerd.)
And there is one lesson I learned from the “chess master” (probably just some random dude but seemed like a master at the time) that has stuck with me to this very day.
It’s something I’ve used in all aspects of my life.
And it’s something you can use to write better copy, craft better offers, think up big ideas, and overall just be a happier person.
And it has to do with sitting on your hands.
Well let’s let the chess master explain:
On the first day of chess club, the chess master told us before making any move, we should sit on our hands. We should do so, to give ourselves time to think, instead of moving pieces around.
In chess, this is important because you must think many moves ahead.
But it’s not so different in marketing.
You can’t just think up an offer. You have to think up an offer that is congruent with your upsell, your funnel, and your brand.
Same with emails.
You can’t just run to the keyboard and type furiously.
First you need an idea.
And the best way to come up with ideas, is to sit on your hand and do nothing.
Stare at a wall.
Go for a walk.
Watch a pretty sunset.
In fact, I joke my neighbors think I’m an insane unemployed person, because I pace back and forth in my backyard a ton thinking through copywriting projects and such.
On the outside it looks like I’m dicking around.
On the inside, I’m “sitting on my hands”.
It’s also the reason why copywriting fees (mine included) can seem high to people who have never worked with copywriters before and have never written a lot of copy.
They don’t realize how much mental energy is taken up.
The factory workers in my mind area always tinkering away, trying to find the next good angle, thinking of the next objefction to overcome, pondering a creative way to explain the same boring idea.
So when you hire me (or any good copywriter really) it’s not just another body typing words on a page.
It’s an extra 86 billion neurons helping you solve your business challenges.
To get all 86 billion of my neurons working for you, go here:
A while back I “stumbled” upon a copywriting secret you can use to write better titles for your books, videos, or any other offers.
It’s not something I’ve heard taught anywhere.
It's just something I noticed after viewing a lot of offers thinking a lot about it.
And the weirdest part is, you can find this copywriting secret in your garden shed.
I’m going to tell you the secret of course. But first, a quick sidetrack:
The reason this was on my mind this morning is because I’ve grown fed up with people bugging me about not having any offers so I have committed to have a book locked, loaded, and ready to fire by November 1st (if that interests you, keep your eyes peeled).
With that out of the way, here’s the secret:
In my dad’s garden shed he has a product called “Spray N’ Grow”.
This product is completely non-unique and boring. All it is is micro-nutrients which is essentially a plant multi-vitamin.
So what does plant vitamins have to do with copywriting?
Everything my Dear Watson.
Because this completely mundane product is transformed by a stellar product name:
“Spray N’ Grow”
Not only is the main benefit / transformation baked-into the name, but they do so with an image.
More, they imply a mechanism with “spray”.
In just three tiny words, the product conveys to the prospect exactly what they will get.
If you look around, you’ll notice a lot of successful offers do the same:
“ClickFunnels” (i.e. create a funnel with a few clicks)
“Make Him Worship You” (Chris Haddad’s new dating offer for women)
“The 30-Day Diabetes Cure” (an old Boardroom Inc. book)
“Oprah’s Big Book Of Happiness (a promo written by A-List copywriter Carline Cole)
In all these examples, there’s no room for “hmmm what will I get”.
It’s all spelled out.
Anyway, I hope this helps you think through your offer.
For help with your copy, head here: