A few months back I booted up my Facebook (aka Farcebook) for two reasons:
1) To join a virtual mastermind group I’m a part of (which turned out to be a very wise business decision)
2) A client has a Facebook group which is like a “hidden profit center” and some of the best market research a man could ask for (not the point of this email, but a little lesson in and of itself).
One of the side benefits of logging in a few times a week for market research is I get to see my clients off galavanting and having fun.
One of them was posting about spear fishing with an old friend… and another is always taking his family out to eat at cute cafes and spending quality time with them.
Truth be told, at first it pissed me off.
“They’re out there having fun while I’m here slaving away writing all their emails!?!”
But it soon hit me:
“Uhhh, that’s sorta the point.”
That’s the reason they started their biz, built it like it is, and hired me.
They want to make more money, while still having more free time to do the things they love.
And I’m happy to help them do that.
Now obviously they did a ton of work to build their business before they ever met me. So I can’t take the credit.
But they did tell me they are very pleased with the copy, the sales we’ve made, and that they haven’t had to spend time writing their emails, which gives them more time to focus on the “big bucks” tasks only they can do.
Like talking with JV partners and affiliates… creating new products… coaching their students… and so on.
What does this have to do with you?
Not much I suppose.
Unless you are planning on hiring me or another copywriter.
If so, read this closely:
I can’t promise you that hiring me will give you a lifestyle business.
It largely depends on the business you already have.
But I can promise that hiring me will take your email copy off your plate while most likely making more sales, so you can spend more time with your family, friends, and hobbies, and doing the things that will grow your business exponentially over time.
Then just click this link:
Ads that might kill people
I recently saw a commercial that not only might kill someone…
But it shows how pitiful our society has become.
It was a car ad and the entire thrust went something like this:
EXT. RANDOM HIGHWAY. DAY
A single car drives down the highway in the middle of a desert. A mom and her children are in the car. The mom looks tired and distracted.
In a world filled with fatigue and distractions, one mother beats the odds…
The camera zooms in for a medium shot on the mother’s face. Her heavy lids noticeably drooping as her head nods away…
Introducing, the Adventum McDeezy Deluxe. The only car in its class with auto assist capabilities. For when you’re driving tired, distracted, or when you’re just too plain dumb to perform even the most basic functions in society.
Camera zooms out showing the mother’s head dropping like a freshman in 1st period Geometry. The car starts to swerve off the road… only to be brought back seconds later by the auto assist functions. The mother jolts awake scared at first, but a smile quickly forming on her lips.
Drive drunk, distracted, tired, and with your precious kids in the car. No matter how dangerous or idiotic your actions, the Adventum McDeezy Deluxe has your back.
And there is an example of an ad that might kill someone.
Even still, the car company (the real one, not the made up “Adventum McDeezy Deluxe”) targeted a HUGE fear parents have.
Their kids being in unsafe conditions (even worse, unsafe conditions caused by the parents).
And to make it even more geniuser, they aren’t giving the parents a solution that takes any work on their part.
“Keep doing what you are doing, and even if you drive high on cocaine while playing Sodoku, your kids will be ok.”
Again, I find it stupid. I’d much rather encourage people to take responsibility over their actions and the safety of their children.
But as far as ads go?
Not too shabby.
More gooey-goodness here:
P.S. The aforementioned car ad could be made even better by wrenching on those emotions even harder.
Why not start with a gruesome car crash? Body parts flying. Skulls smashed on pavements. Fireman and paramedics crying “Why does this have to happen!? Not again!!!”
The mother, sobbing in tears, wrapped in one of those blankets they always give car crash victims in movies, crying about how she should’ve protected her children, she should’ve taken a nap, had some coffee, and put away her Sodoku.
In fact, I’m gonna write the car company and let them know my thoughts.
I’ll let you know how it goes.
Last week I sent an email about the very likely chance the government will begin making online business more difficult.
And I peppered that email with things that I hoped would piss someone off and get me a troll.
But alas. When I checked my email, a troll I did not have.
Instead, I had a slightly sassy response.
Coming online crackdown?
Hasn’t this been happening for 2+ years with the blood bath of Facebook/Google Affiliate marketers and their non compliant “magic weight loss pills” getting butchered?
Indeed. That’s true.
Platforms like Google have been cracking down on SEO and ads for years and years.
And a close reading of that email would show that was indeed the point.
The “coming” part of the online crackdown specifically referred to government interference. Which we saw with the EU’s privacy laws passed a few years ago… and is continuing with laws like AB-5.
The point wasn’t that I’m some soothsayer who is seeing the future when no one else is.
The point is that this has always happened.
And will continue to happen.
And anyone with a modicum of awareness can clearly see it happening and can see how it is very likely to get worse very soon.
So if you’d like to get me writing and consulting for your business before our overlords throw us in the online marketing gulag, check this:
First you gotta head here and unlock my daily email tips
A few years back, a friend sent me this cartoon:
As a vinyl collector, this gives me all the feels.
Because I’ve spent countless hours (and countless hundreds) finding, buying, storing, cleaning, and doing all the other things it takes to keep records and their players in tip-top shape.
Not to mention the days I’ve spent shuffling through dusty record stores trying to find a yet-to-be-earthed gem.
All of which I enjoy and am happy to do.
Yet, at the same time, it’s a total pain in the ass.
Which brings up an interesting point about sales and marketing.
Which is that if you have something your audience really wants, they will do just about anything to get it.
In fact, in the case of vinyl, part of the fun *IS* the extra time and effort it takes.
So how can you use that in your marketing?
Truth be told, I’m not totally sure.
It’s all situational.
In most cases most of the time, I’m a big believer you should make buying from you as easy as possible. Which means optimizing landing page load times, making checkout pages simple as pie, easy customer service, etc and so on.
But if you have a niche business with a white-hot audience?
Then barriers, scenic pullovers, and a veritable “maze” can sometimes flip their fanaticism into overdrive.
Something to noodle on at least.
One of the secrets of getting white-hot fans regardless of niche is good copy.
For help with that, click the link below and fill out the form. When you do, you’ll be added to my daily email tips:
I recently heard someone say that most entrepreneurs are “from the island of misfit toys”.
In other words, most of us didn’t fit in, are unhirable, or for whatever reason live outside the circle of reality populated by “normies”.
Which I’ve found to be 1000% true.
But there’s something else I’ve noticed too:
Many business owners—in an attempt to buy their freedom—build their business in a way that just creates another job.
So they get into it to make more money and spend more time at home with their family…
But end up waking up early to squeeze in work… stay up late to finish projects… and even get stuck behind the computer during holidays in an attempt to get done the ten thousand tasks that pile on their ever growing to-do list.
It’s enough to make you say:
“I just don’t want to worry about this shit anymore”
Especially because most entrepreneurs are smart and creative.
We don’t like doing tiny little frustrating tasks that sap our energy and make doing the big important things harder.
Because when you’re bogged down doing stuff you don’t want to do and aren’t good at—and doing those things takes time away from your health, family, and the things that inspire you (i.e. all the reasons you started a business in the first place)—then it sorta begs the question “what the hell is the point”?
Of course there will always be things you need to get done that aren’t your “main squeeze” tasks.
Which is fine.
But every business leader I’ve studied teaches to get as many of those tasks off your plate as you possibly can.
Especially something like copywriting.
Because strategizing campaigns, thinking up hooks and angles, and sitting down to draft and edit copy takes up a ton of RAM on your mental computer (especially if copywriting is something that doesn’t come to you naturally).
RAM you could otherwise use profitably elsewhere.
Or RAM you could use to spend more time doing the things you love.
So if you’re currently stranded on the sea of overwhelm and you’ve ever thought to yourself “I just don’t want to worry about this copywriting crap anymore”, grab the liferaft below:
The following three (made up) subject lines all share a glaring mistake.
(Possibly more than one. But there is one in particular that stands out like a plank in the eye.)
Can you spot what it is?
1) How to scour the internet for new clients
2) Read, write, and study your way to nearly any skill
3) New “bucket of sweat” workout drops weight fast!
Know what it is?
No, then you better sign up for my daily email tips here:
P.S. If you think you know it, you should still sign up and email me your answer. Just to make sure you're right...
A friend of mine (who owns a podcast production company) sent me an article a while back about how podcasting giant Gimlet Media is getting sued for being inaccessible to deaf people.
On one hand I feel it.
It would suck to be born with a disability that made it much harder to function in society.
But expecting—nay forcing—the world to bend and cater to your whim?
Seems excessive to me.
After all, Charlie Kaufman’s films are inaccessible to those with low IQs and lack of cinematic knowledge.
Should he be penalized?
What about rollercoasters? Short people and pregnant ladies can't ride them.
Should they be shut down?
But my guess is no.
Anyway, you may be wondering, what does this have to do with you?
Well in this ever increasing sensitive world… and with more and more stuff—including business, voting, social life, and more—coming online… the 1984-esque, lawyer-controlled oppressive regime will only get worse.
And even though emails probably won’t be affected by ADA requirements because screen readers take care of it, you never really know what the next turn will be.
We’ve seen it with the EU. We’re seeing it with podcasts.
And next, we might see them coming for you.
Which is why I’ve kept this in the back of my mind ever since I heard Ben Settle talk about it (it’s something he said he learned from reading Dan Kennedy’s autobiography):
Make your money while you can.
Because if you look back over the last 100 years, taxes, laws, regulations, and stupidity only seem to increase.
If you'd like to make your money while you still can, I suggest sprinting (not walking) to the link below where you can unlock more of my money-making tips:
When you do, you will be added to my waitlist and will be notified when I next have an opening in my schedule. Which will be November at the earliest and possibly not until 2020 breathes its last gasping, corona-scented breath and 2021 ushers in Fuhrer Chump's American Reich.
P.S. The (very likely) coming online crackdown mixed with the increased competition is another reason I’m considering starting an entirely offline business. If you don’t use any offline media (at least direct-mailing your best buyers) I highly suggest you begin considering it.
Right now, I mostly only write email copy. So if you want help with that, the link is above.
As a marketer, you know that offer to list match is always more important than copy.
But in my experience, there are many tweaks and turns you can make in your copy that can help sell even incongruent offers to burnt out lists.
For example, there’s a simple subject line secret I recently used in an affiliate campaign selling an offer that wasn’t fully congruent. And the email I used it on kicked butt (it brought in nearly a quarter of the sales from the entire campaign).
And this subject line secret is totally counter-intuitive.
Because it’s all about lowering potential readership.
Which is why it’s something you’re very unlikely to hear bandied about by people who boast on their open rates.
But when it comes to less-than-congruent offers, this subject line technique (and carrying the technique through in the body copy) makes the prospect feel like the offer is catered to them.
And the truth is, it has nothing to do with talking about the offer and everything to do with talking about the prospect.
Which is a lot harder for most people.
Because understanding an offer is way easier than understanding a person.
We are complex human beans after all.
But if you’re ever in the position of selling not fully congruent offers (which I hear health lists have been selling financial offers profitably since Coroney hit, so it’s not as crazy as you think) this is the main technique I’d recommend.
Welp, that’s all I'm gonna say on the matter.
To unlock more delectable daily email tips conveniently located to your primary email address, go forth:
When I started writing copy, I did everything the gurus taught:
Read. Study swipes. Hand copy controls. Take courses. And so on and so forth.
But still, every time I’d send copy into a client… I’d cringe.
Because I didn’t really know if it was good.
I hadn’t written enough.
Or seen how copy performed in the real world.
So not only was landing clients scary. Fulfilling the work was scary too.
And even when they’d send back an email saying “good work” I’d doubt it. I’d think “They’re lying. They don’t really know good copy. It’s gonna bomb.”
It took me a long time, a lot of books, a lot of courses, and a lot of swipes before I felt like “I got this”.
If I could go back and do it again, I’d spend way less time and money on that and use the “cringe method” to shortcut it all.
What’s the “cringe method”?
Get someone who understands good copy to tear your work a new booty-hool (in a good way).
I call it the “cringe method” because at first it may make you cringe to get your flaws pointed out.
But I can tell you, when you get your copy critiqued, you can pick up more immediately applicable info than by reading an entire book.
At least that’s been my experience.
Because critiques are imminently catered to the exact problems holding your copy back right now.
It’s not theory.
It’s not hard to understand concepts.
It’s imminently useful.
Best of all, it gives you confidence that what you wrote has a “working copywriter stamp of approval”.
And that’s priceless.
Because nothing prevents you from writing like fear of failure.
I do offer critiques sometimes. But only to those who are signed up for my email list.
Which you can do, and you will also unlock all my email tips, by heading here:
Al Davis, the late coach of the infamous Oakland Raiders, once said something incredibly wise that can guide your decision-making in life, business, and finding podcast guests too.
It has to do with being reactive versus being proactive.
In other words, you can play your opponents game and react to what they do. Or you can create the game and make your opponent react to you.
Here’s it in his own words:
"We don't take what the defense gives us; we take whatever the hell we want."
Well said Al.
I wish I would've heard that when I was young.
Because the applications are many:
Don’t wait for the perfect spouse, friend, network to arise. Go out and find the right spouse, friend, network for you.
Don’t wait for the research to show you the right copy angle. Choose a great copy angle and go find the research to back it up.
And don’t wait for the perfect podcast guest to knock on your studio door. Go find a great podcast guest and reel them in with your web (mixing metaphors, I know).
The trouble is, it takes a lot of time and effort to find a good podcast guest.
And as a guest, it takes a lot of time to find and pitch podcasts.
Which is one of the reasons I’ve only been going on shows where I get referred.
Like the one I was on recently where the host just emailed me:
“I was blown away by you when you appeared as a guest on my show.”
And really, wowing the host ain’t hard.
You just gotta prepare by thinking up stories and analogies that explain your point. And if you’re like me, you won’t hold anything back.
In fact, I essentially think of it like a paid consultation.
Whatever the host asks, I spill the beans.
Which brings us to the tip of this spear:
You can join my list of daily emails to discover more tips and stories like this by clicking the link below--